I don't have a lot of time right now because I spent it all playing with elder clark, but I had a week that was awesome and I want to tell you about it. It's kinda of a followup from last week and everything that I was feeling there, it's just kinda a lot more clear to me now and I had some way cool experiences along with it. So imma just dive in.
Monday we went out, and honestly didn't get that much, which is hard when you are going to be gone during the week. But regardless we had a good night.
Tuesday, was hard. I dont really have time to go into all of the details why, but it just was. It was one of those days where you realize that you've been going for a really long time, and a whole bunch of things just start to mess with your head. when nothing super exciting is happening with your area you're brought back to the point where its really easy to throw myself down and to say that I must be doing something wrong. Despite the fact I've experienced this over and over, after a 5 hour trip from trondheim to Tromsø I was having a really hard time. Not that anyone really knew it, but I just felt done with everything.
We were about to have another splits and I think I was just feeling the pressure that everyone expects you to have success and to help others, and I was afraid in a sense, and tired of the whole thing. My prayers that night were some of the most honest I've ever had with God. I came to the point where its not that I didn't have a testimony, I was just done. I give up. Its not worth it. I've tried for almost 2 years to not compare myself to others, and it still happens. I've tried for almost 2 years to have results and good things happen, and it just doesn't seem like i'm getting anywhere. Let it be known I was having a hard time.
Wendnesday, was amazing. I woke up, and for studies I did a free write in my journal about all the different thoughts I had. I knoew that I needed Christs atonement. I didn't want to give up. I needed help to really want to be here still though. A mission is literally the best thing ever. But for many reasons it gets really really hard at times. SoWednesday was gods day to prove me wrong. I was feeling quite a bit better after a good studies, and when we went out, I honestly wasn't really sure what would happen. I honestly felt like I had lost faith in myself. Not neccesarily god. More just me. God kinda proved me wrong though. Or at least he lifted me up when I felt like I couldn't go any farther. In the 3 or 4 hours we spent on the streets that day, I don't think i've had any more success in my life. In terms of quantity anyways. And in a lot of ways quality too because most of them were norwegians. We knew exactly where to go knocking. We knew who to talk to, and we knew what to say. I and I learned a very important lesson that it is really God that is behind everything here. Not that I didn't know all these things before, but by the end of the day I felt great. And it only got better when I stuck my head out the window, and saw a streak of northern lights that night. We busted out of the apt. and ran to the nearest hill so we could see them better. They were still just off in the distance but they were still really cool. All in all by the end of that day I just felt Gods love. Thats what I bore my testimony about in sacrament meeting. I knew that what i've done is enough. It was an amazing experience where God just picked me up and took me forward.
Thursday. Our plane boards at 6:20 in the morning. No problem right? We'll just call a taxi. I go change and Elder skinner Calls. its now 5:05. Wait. No one is available? All booked out? You cant help us? ok. bye. ... So wait. no busses. no nightbusses, no members, no senior couple, no car, no taxi, no anything. Well... We could run to the airport... it'll probbalby faster if we go over the middle of the island. Dude thats a 40 minute bus ride from here. its now5:20. Shoot. We're running. Pakc fast, Pray that we have God Speed and Get out. Its now 5:25, and we're hauling down the icy road. We've got a long way to go. I feel that everything will be ok though. 5:40. Wait our plane leaves at 6,55 right? nope. 6,40. Crap. We find the cross country skiing trail that leads across the island. We slip and fall a few times, but get up and keep going. 6:00: We make to the main road again. We can see the airport but we're still a good ways away and we have to run around the airstrip. You're kidding right. We start sprinting. 6:09. We make it the Jekta senter. at the bottom of the airstrip. Our plane starts boarding... ( they started early) We are all cashed out. But the spirit says: You've got to keep going! You Cant give up now! DONT GIVE UP! So I grab his bedding and mine and take off again. This next run was the worst 10 minutes of my life i'm pretty sure. I think I know what it's like to run a marathon and throw up at the end. And It was made harder by the fact I had 35 pounds of extra stuff (i wieghed it). 3 times I wanted to just start walking. 'No you cant walk!" Every time I was told to keep going! 6:22 we made it to the airport. They would let us print off our tickets at first and then they relented and we ran! Tons of lines... We skipped and jsut went through. WE were COMPLETELY SOAKED at this point. mY suit jacked was completely wet. It was sooo gross. WE stunk. We ran through, didn't even bother to put on our belts or shoes ran onto the plane and the gate closed behind us. ... 6:25. We took the back 2 seats on the plane and collapsed.
10:35 I got the best tasting powerade of my life. Stupid planes with no water. Long bussride home
11. Shower
12. WE go out with a member after grabbing a sandwhich and teach some old people while we're half falling asleep. The first lady asked for a blessing and we were able to do that for her. She has had her husband die just recently, and now she cant walk. But God does take care of us. He always helps us. She said that its really him that knows whats going to happen and what we can do. I was in complete agreence. Be at peace with what you have. Reap the peace that comes from your faith.
5:30 Myren buys us kbab, and then we run to help George.
6:30 I'm afraid for my life because he drives no handed.
7:30 We're at Missionary coordiantion meeting. I'm really tired.
8:30 We run out to see a strip of norther lights RIGHT OVER OUR HEADS!!!
9:30 We get home and haven't seen any more. But we run out onto our balcony just to check. THERE WAS A HUGE BRIGHT SQUGGLIY LINE right over our heads. ANd more popped up. We started going crazy and i got some amazing pictures even with my little dopey camera. IT WAS SOO COOL!!!! They were the best lights anyone has seen in trondheim in years. We were going nuts.
11 the lights have stopped. I'm going to bed. Heavenly father, thanks for the awesome day. :)
That run taught me one of the coolest lessons on my mission. EVERy single time I wanted to give up. God said: NO. Not yet. Don't give up yet. Just keep going a little more. K i'm out of time. There is sooo much more!
The two black ninjas challenged the white ninja in our apt on saturday. needless to say, my closet door got broken, and our apt. got trashed in the fight. We went all out :)
And At the end, on sunday after talking with olea, I know why i'm here. Sort of :) I'm doing what God needs me to do. And I feel great about it. The whole rest of the week was amazing. WAy cool finding. random referalls.
aNyways.
I love you mom!
I'll send some pic!
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