I just figured I cut out giving you any name at all and just use the one letter, most lazy way of saying anyones name. You are now M. :)
And about the socks, at this point I can't see any reason to spend all that money on a package just for that. I'll make it to the end. And even if I need new one's it'll probably be cheaper for me to go get a couple of cheap pairs rather than spending the postage, and the precious room in my luggage on the way home that is going to be used on chocolate.
Anyways. I'm glad that you love music. I think it has a similar effect on me, if not to the same degree as it does to you. I'm pretty decided on the fact that i'm coming home and devoloping my musical talents a little more. Especially in the piano area.
About this week, we ... just went to work. If there is only one thing I could convey it's that me and Elder JOnes (yes I got a new companion... poor elder linge is already home with his family now :) We just went to work. And God made the actual miracles happen. Sometimes you actually work and things don't happen. But I think my level of faith has been changing a lot. THere have been lots of things changing a lot. My commitment, my consecration to the work and to God, my love of work, my lack of any real understanding about how important everything is :) Or at least the realization of the latter. But it was amazing.
This week was påske week, which is the week where ALL the stores close for 5 days and everyone leaves to go spend time skiing in the mountains. There really isn't anything in america anything like what happens in Norway during holidays. Where it literally just becomse a ghost town. But anyways. Usually this makes missionary work really hard. But at the beginning of the week, I had just barely gotten with my new, and last companion ever, and we sat down in a meeting with president and looked at the worst week the Norway Oslo mission had seen in a long time. Like really the report was terrible. And its not like he hated us or thought we were bad, it was more of a: 'what in the world are we going to do?' We have such good spiritual missionaries here, that we are just baffled when we aren't having as much success. We identified some problems, and let me tell you, Elder Jones and I felt the heat. Especially when you know, if we as the assistants aren't able to pull this off, we can't be able to expect everyone else to do it either. It has to start with us. Not that we are the only one's capable but just that all the Area 70's tell us is as the leadership goes, so goes the mission. So it started with us, and then we needed to be abel to help all the zone leaders feel the same thing. So this whole week we went hard. And even though it was påske we made things happen. It was unreal. My whole outlook changed from 'hoping' that things would happen. Hoping is good. But this week and for the rest of my time, things MUST happen. We have to make the difference. People just need to be lining up for baptism. So me and elder Jones set out to beat that. I can't even explain it. But I like... really believe that we are going to make things happen. And this week that's what happened.
We had 45 minutes to contact with the Elders and honestly I didn't know if we were going to reach our goal of setting an appointment with someone that week. Instead, we got 2 appts. and some toher numbers. people that Elder Cooper and Curtis are now teaching. sweet. That day we went out to Hønefoss and met with this woman named Liv and her grandson. She is crazy. Super nice. And way funny. But crazy. Probably one of the worst lessons I've had in a long time. But we came back. We had splits with the Drammen zone leaders the next day after their zone meeting and we knew we needed to light things up. We had a super koselig little member dinner, and really commited them to doing missionary work both to members and nonmembers and I can tell i've gotten way more bold and direct with people in these invitations. And I do it not because I needed anything, but because you know it will make them soo happy! DAng it. Then me and Elder Holden (whom I half trained and LOVE) went knocking and wrecked it. We found a family and like 5 other potentials, went out on the street and immedattely just sat down on a bench and starting talking to someone and got a new investigator for them on the spot and the same happened with Elder JOnes. Btw's earlier that week we went out to go knocking, again, first kid we talked to, got his number. RAinmaker. It happens every rime. After the splits we had a cool splits review, and I felt like we were literally on fire. Under pressure of course, to do well and do our best, but we had a ton of urgency. ANd just a ton of faith that we can actaully do this.
In our own area the next day, we spent a lot of time working on moves with president (AH ITS STILL NOT DONE AND WE HAVE TO MAKE THE CALL AND PLAN EVERYTHING IN LIKE 6 DAYS!!!!) (REALLY THOUGH: its been changing a ton. This one has been a beast to figure out) and then me and elder Jones went out knocking and even though most people weren't home, we ended up teaching a full hour lesson to a man, and we're going back later this week.I was on splits with Elder cooper and the whole day was just filled with awesomeness. We were together with Axel and his family and his dad (whom we are taecing) and had an easter activity, and then we had like 5 hours to just hit the streets and kncok doors. There were a grand total of 24 people that answered the door. of the those 24, 6 were interested in having us come back a share our message this week. THat's an insane number. Then, we had tried to visit this polish man earlier that day, and he hadn't been there, and so with an hour left we prayed to know if we should keep going or if we should go try somewhere else, and we felt really strongly that we needed to go somewhere else. Well we went and on the way we remembered to stop by the polish man again. ANd he and his freind were home! So we were able to teach a lesson and reach our goal of finding 2 investigators that day. In my whole time in Sandvika, i've found 1. We doubled that in one day when no one was home, only because God knew what we needed to do. ANd we had set a goal that day that we were commited to it. Then i made them chocolate frosty'es. ( I can by the way, legit make wendy's frosty :) It was soooo good. We knew how to help these people and what to do.
I've learned that the Gospel is perfect. And every single verse, every thing that is told is just a small piece in the puzzle that eventually will make sense with everything else. "For he that saveth his life shall lose it, but he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it." As I have over the weeks and months given up everything that I want or the things that I think will make me happy for what I know that He wants I have truly found myself. I've never before known myself better than the instant that I gave up everything I want for myself for what I know He wants me to do. I'm absolutely exhausted. And I have very strong opinions about how things should be done. But at the same time, I feel like I only found myself, because I just forgot about it trying to do what was best for others. Sacrifice brings forth the blessings of Heaven. Consecration is more than just sacrificing things that you want, and is much more about how much our will is combinded with the Will of God. When I give up the very desire to be lazy, or to turn back, or to focus on anything but now, and rather have all of my wants and desires to go out and to serve and talk to people and dot things that are hard for me, I am consecrated. And I realize how much potential I really have as a person. I need to believe that we can baptize, and serve and help others.
Mom, I am learning so much. Every day brings something new. Something new I wish I could write down and keep, but there simply isn't time for it all. So This is all I have. Is that we have to do hard things. And we have to learn to love it. We learn to love a life completely dedicated to the service of others. Missions are awesome. I'll have a few words for any poor soul who doesn't want to go or doesn't think the sacrifice of change and time is worth it. :)
I love you with all my heart and soul mom! I hope you are able to do everything you need to!
Wait! I'm not done yet!
Just one last thought:
I used to think that everyone who said that all they wanted to do is go out and do missionary work and help others all the time were crazy. More than that I thought they were complete robots. That you really had no personality of your own if all you did was missionary work or serving other people. Its kindof a hard thought to describe, but I really thought that their lives must not be that enjoyable because they didn't have anything that made them 'different'.
Well... I was wrong. Or at least i'm pretty sure I was wrong. Because this newfound change is amazing. I feel less robotic than ever. I don't feel like I do anything because i'm told to, but rather because I want to. And in the process I found what truly brings me hapiness. Really. Anyone who tries to focus on themself, will in the end completely end up losing it. Christ really had the only way where we figure out what we're really made of. What pushes us to our limits, and helps us to grow beyond a walking pile of dirt that is influenced by others, rather than making the difference in the world around him.
Wow. OK. anyways. I can't really share all the thoughts I've had. Me and Elder Jones have been up talking almost every night this week about the mission and the challegnes and blessings and just everything. I love it.
And I love you mom :) Happy day of birth! You should go thank your mom for that one ;) That should be the real celebration on birthdays :) JK. We can celebrate how awesome you are too!